Montreal Hash House Harriers
Hash Trash, R*n #217 (21-Jan-2001)

The "Alien Poo" Hash
by Double Fisted, Stand-in Scribe

Hares: Flipper, Witchy

Hashers:
Dead Animal, Foxy Lady, Turkish Delight, Mustapha Kunt, Pop-a-Weenie, Easy Ride, Total F**kup, Oral Supplement, Captain Canada, Skinflint, Abbot, Muddy Nipples, Numbskull, Yogi, Smegma, Tigress, LOB, Paul, Old Cheddar,
Double Fisted, Neutron Bomb, Speed Hump (in spirit only - SH-next time: Stay! We'll be right back!)

Weather:
The weather was too warm to run in a down jacket but too cold for two layers as demonstrated by yours truly. (I wonder though why my bum is always cold no matter how I dress) About -13 plus the wind chill with light flakes falling fom the heavens.

Trail:
We followed a lime green (thus the alien poo...) trail. A bit hard to see but easier to find than the carrots 2 weeks ago... Started out at the Rock Quest, a typical rock bar featuring this month: a blues guitarist, a AC/DC tribute band and the Canadian Chippendales (apparently Captain as featured on these posters. Must be a secret sidejob. No wonder he works so much! He
must be taking time off from work to fuel his need to shake his booty...)

We ran through a lovely residental area following the alien green poo... then I shortcutted and ran back to the bar. I said it was cold! Oral and I wandered into the Pier 1 and enjoyed browsing through the overpriced, unsturdy furniture and knick-knacks. Ran into Witchy, Flipper, and Tigress. We discussed the merits of fancy martini glasses vs. traditional ones. Shaken, not stirred. We then came into the bar where everyone had arrived and were enjoying the BEvERages.

Down Downs, RA Offenses and Other reasons we get to drink BEvERages:

Easy Ride, Smegma, Tigress, as latecummers. She missed the hash but had time to browse at Pier 1.

Paul, Neutron Bomb, Witchy, Flipper as returnees. (Captain was also a returnee but I am not sure if he drank...)

The Hares for giving shitty directions causing Speed Hump to be late for the hash.

Muddy Nipples for winning the best presentation at a conference discussing something other than beer.

Neutron Bomb for wimping out, canceling next week and not arranging a replacement hare.

NB's and OC's friend who came in the middle of the circle and had a DD for showing up (sorry I can't remember your name).

Double Fisted and Oral Supplement for browsing at the above mentioned store. Yogi for cumming very late.

Double Fisted received the Dickhead award for running without a jacket.
LOB awarded the Numbskull to himself cause noone else deserved it.

Hash Naming:
Max was named Easy Ride for his infamous website, www.carpoolworld.com (I hope I got the name correct).

Songs:
Abbot attempted to sing a lovely new song, Old King Cole, yet another lovely song from my childhood mutilated and mangled by the Hash for their own evil purposes. When this failed to get the attention of some daft hashers *cough*cough* Cheddar*cough*cough,* Numbskull serenaded the writer with what she believed would be a lovely tribute to her good looks and wonderful personality. Alas, this is a hash and nothing is sacred (cum-stained teeth???). We also sang "I'm singing in the rain" lead by Abbot. Then we gave them a down down. Ain't life grand?

Best line:
"Wow. That's really big. I don't know if it'll fit."-NB's and OC's friend while speaking about Yogi's cellphone (Ok, ok... I paraphrased...)

Submitted by this not-so-much scribe,
Double Fisted